This has been a horrible, horrible week for our family. Earlier this week Teagan was rushed to the ER for breathing issues (full story in my post below). We’ve been struggling to keep Taryn well enough to have surgery next week. It was just supposed to be to have her tonsils and adenoids removed but through the entire nightmare that is surgery pre-op workups, blood work, audiology exams, cultures, etc., we found out the surgery will be more extensive that we initially hoped. Her ENT said this is one of the worst cases she’s seen in a very long time, her adenoids are so huge they are all but blocking off the area behind her nose. Her tonsils are almost touching each other and she’s having trouble with sleep apnea. She will also need to have tubes put in her ears due to a problem with her eardrums, which totally took us by surprise because she’s only had one ear infection her entire life. She also has a sinus condition that has resulted in infectious pneumonia in her sinus cavities. I didn’t even know such a thing could happen. We literally had something going on every day this week, a dr. appt for one of the kids, blood work, cultures, pre-op appts. At one of those appointments we found out that one of Teagan’s tubes is dislodged in his ear and he’ll need to have another out patient surgery very soon to get it fixed again. Annnnnnnd, I found out I have a double eye infection….great. I’ve just had all of these thoughts of what am I doing wrong? Where am I failing as a mother that I cannot keep my children well?
Then, today I was watching my friends daughter because her son needed to go to the hospital for a few tests. After a few errands I decided to pick up lunch and take the kids to the park to play. While there Taryn fell off the playground equipment and was seriously hurt. She broke two bones in her right arm but it’s pretty bad. Especially for only falling about 2.5 feet to the ground. We thought after the ambulance arrived that she may have hurt her head or neck as well (she was turning blue). I didn’t see her fall, my back was turned chasing teagan about 20 feet away. It turns out her little body was just in shock out of pain and fear. She was afraid the firemen were going to take her away from me when she heard the sirens coming 🙁 We were transferred by ambulance to Children’s Dell and after a very long day of doctors, scan’s, ortho’s putting bones back together, heavy sedation, etc., we just made it home. We’re just thanking God she wasn’t more seriously injured and that the orthopedic surgeon was able to do his work from the outside of her body. Amazing what he did for our daughter tonight, we were in shock at the way he manipulated her body and put it back together again. When he started her forearm was a semi-circle with breaks right in the middle of the bones. By the time he was done, looking at the after x-rays, you’d never know what it looked like just a few hours before.
One of the scariest days of my life. She’s ok, but in a lot of pain and will be in a cast from her palm to halfway up between her elbow and shoulder for a minimum of 4 weeks. The hard part is that for the next 72 hours, she has to keep her entire arm up above her heart to avoid swelling at the break points in the bones. No easy task for a 4 year old. In fact she’s sleeping with her arm in a large blue swiss cheese looking foam thing to keep her arm and fingers pointed toward the ceiling. I don’t know what we are going to do about her surgery, we may consider moving it because it just seems too unfair to subject her to so much pain in just 4 days time.
And to the one other mom at the park this afternoon…..I’m sure you’ll never read this as you have no clue who we are….but thank you. Thank you for running to her when she fell and for calling out to me. Thank you for trying to calm me down and think rationally long enough to call 911. Thank you for running to the end of the park with your 2 children plus 2 more to see the name on the street sign so the 911 operator could direct the emergency workers. Thank you for chasing the other two children with me when I couldn’t. Thank you for carrying Teagan on your hip while I tended to Taryn as they put her on a stretcher. Thank you for not looking at me like I am a horrible mother when I really felt like one. Thank you for being one of my angels today, I wish I could thank you in person, but I didn’t catch your name.
And a huge thank you to our dear friends, Alli and Mike, who take our children on a moments notice (literally, way to get there quick Mike!), love our kids as your own and support us with your friendship. I don’t know what we would do without you guys.
This, very tired, momma is off to bed….
OMG lyndsay…wow. my mother’s heart goes out to you and to let you know from reading your blog…you ARE a good mom. i will be thinking of your family during your recoveries.xoxot
Please don’t beat yourself up about this. There is nothing you could have done that would have made it turn out differently. That woman was there for you b/c you would have done the same thing for her. I’ll be praying for T tomorrow that she has as little pain as possible. (((hugs)))
poor mama and poor taryn!!! I have tears in my eyes reading this. You have had a ROUGH week. I bet that was SO scary for you.
How scary for all of you! Sometimes the bad things just seem to pile up on you and it can be so overwhelming. I hope that you and the kids get a much needed break from all this. Sending many good thoughts your way for good health and happy days!
Goodness….. as I sit on my backporch reading your post this morning, I have tears in my eyes….. It sounds like you were a perfect mamma yesterday!
Wow, I’m crying over here. You guys will make it through this rough patch and be a stronger family for it [if that’s possible:)]. It will get better! ((hugs))
You poor thing! But even if you had been staring right at her, there’s nothing you could have done to stop this. Cut yourself some slack, Mama! I hope she heals quickly and you all get a little extra TLC this week-end.
Poor Taryn! I hope she heals fast and gets better soon. You are an awesome momma. It’s hard to see that sometimes when everything is going wrong, but it’s true. Remember what you said about being in pictures. No matter what you think about yourself on the inside, your kids see they’re only mommy on the outside!
Oh sweetie!! I just want to wrap you up and give you a big hug! What a week! I’m glad you’ve been surrounded by friends and family and park angels 🙂 And for what it’s worth coming from a stranger who blog stalks you, you are a fabulous mom!
Oh L!!! You are not a bad Mom!!! Hugs. Things will turn around. I am right up the street if you need anything, anything at all!
Baby girl you needed a re-do….hope T is feeling better soon. All my best and *hugs*
Oh Lyndsay- I am so sorry! You are such a great momma and I am so sorry this has been such a rough week for your family. Thinking of you guys. ((hugs))
After finding your blog and reading your posts over the last couple of months, everyone can see that you are a good mom…your posts are always full of joy and love for your kids.
Scary, but every mom has a day like this…don’t beat yourself up about it. Accidents happen, they are kids afterall. Just give them extra love and hopefully they will start to feel better soon.
sounds like such a scary day filled with lots of angels watching over you and helping you and your family…I sincerely pray for peace and comfort for all of you–you certainly deserve it!!
Oh my gosh, Lindsay…wow. What an awful couple of days you’ve had. I’m having a hard time even coming up with the right thing to say. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that. And (even though I don’t know you IRL) you are a GOOD mom…don’t doubt that for a second. Here’s hoping Taryn heals quickly from her broken arm and that her surgery goes smoothly. Just think of how much better she’ll feel when it’s all said and done. ((((hugs))))
Oh man, you’ve really been dealt a tough week! Things can only get better! Best of luck on the surgery and here’s hoping everyone gets well soon!
All I can say is OMG! You poor, poor mommy!
A bad mom wouldn’t be worrying about being a bad mom. A bad mom wouldn’t care if her kids were sick or take them to find out if they were sick. Never doubt that you are an amazing mom…even from accross the country I can see that, never doubt the wonder woman who helped you saw it too. Sending your family prayers from TN..
What a week for you! I have a very similar response to pain as Teagan does. When I have severe pain, I faint and go into seizure like convulsions. For a while they thought I had epilepsy, but all of those tests checked out fine. Eventually we figured out I was experiencing vaso-vagal reactions. Basically, my body responded to pain by dropping my heart rate and blood pressure, causing a decrease in blood to the brain, leading to fainting. In Teagan’s case, it sounds like that’s what turned her blue. I tell you this not to scare you, but to try to reassure you. A whole host of things can trigger vaso-vagal reactions–fear, pain, etc, but it will not harm Teagan. When I was younger, I didn’t know what was going on, so I just let my body go to my pain free place–aka fainting. Now that I’m an adult I can tell when they are coming and can usually talk myself out of fainting. I often just sit down, put my head between my knees and take deep breaths. Most people out grow these reactions, but I unfortunately haven’t. I’m not sure if that’s what happened with Teagan, but if it was, I thought it best to share my experience. Hang in there momma!
Lots of prayers for all of you! You’re a great mom and your kids know that!
oh my goodness L, I’m crying while reading this. What an ordeal. Huge hugs to you and the family. I hope you all get some much needed rest and that T has a relatively pain free recovery.
Oh my goodness, what a rotten time for you and those little ones!:( You are not a bad mom and I would’ve felt the same way…kids are fast and we as moms really *can’t* do it all. I’ve seen my youngest (19 months) fall down steps when I was *right there*. She wasn’t hurt, but she could’ve been and I felt horrible! I really hope you guys get a break in the chaos REALLY soon, you sound like you could really use it!!
Oh my, that WAS a very tough week for you. I remember feeling like a bad-mother when my kiddos were all getting sick and bad diagnosis one after another. But the truth is it is NOT something we did or didn’t do, it’s just out of our control. This too shall pass! And when little T will be all healed up after the surgery you’ll breath a huge sigh of relief. My niece’s voice, demeanor and whole personality changed to absolutely bright and happy after her huge adenoids and tonsils were gone. Blessings!
Another Tennessee mommy sending you cyberhugs. Is there anything I can send to Taryn to cheer her up? Or to you? Feel free to email me if you think of anything that I could send that would make Taryn smile. Accidents happen. You were right there. Luckily it was just her arm and not something more serious like a spinal injury. She is a tough little girl and you are one awesome mommy who loves her kids. Take it easy for a few days and just love on your babies….Blessings to you…..
Lindsay…just wanted to send some positive vibes to you and your family!! Your children are so lucky to have parents that are obviously so in love with them!! ((big hug to you!!))
You are not a bad mom in anyway. Accidents happen. From what I read on your blog you are a very loving and dedicated mother. Anyone would be lucky to call you mom. Keep your chin up and I will send prayers your way.
Oh, L, I am so sorry and poor little T!! What a week. Sending a giant hug your way.
I am so sorry for all that you are going through these last couple of days. I am praying for your family and know that you will all be ok. You seem like such a strong woman with a strong family. I am so glad you have wonderful people around you to help you and support you. Take care and good luck this week with Taryn!
oh lyndsay… what a week you’ve had!! hopefully the troubles are behind you now.. amazing gift you had from that other mom and for the doctors who tended to taryn so well.. funny how angels surround us when we need it most.. try to hang in there! thinking of you..happy thoughts and lots of love to lift you up! you’re a great mommy – dont doubt it for a second. 🙂
I am so sorry to hear about Taryn! I hope she is feeling better soon! I am so glad you had an angel today to help you out too. Hang in there!
Bless your heart. We do have a sweet, sweet God you know, who is watching over you, weeping with you, supporting, loving, waiting in anticipation for another glance from you. I know he is with you now as always. I am praying for unbelievable peace.
OMGoodness – (((hugs))) – I am so sorry you and your family have had a rough week. You are not a horrible mother at all!!! My prayers that everyone will be on the mend soon. Take care of yourself!
With tears in my eyes, thinking of you. You are an amazing mama. Hang in there. Get some rest. Hope everyone is well soon. xoxo
Lyndsay, I know I can’t really say anything to make it better, except that I will pray for all of you. I had tears in my eyes just reading this, and then of course had to explain to my husband why I was so upset. I know there are other people in your blogging world who reach out more than I, but I really do consider you a friend. I refer to you as my friend when I talk about you. I care about you and your family. It just breaks my heart that you’ve had such a rough week and especially with Taryn’s accident. That mom who helped you, even if she never reads your words of thanks, she knows how appreciative and thankful you were/are for her being there. I’m sure of it.
Take care my friend and I’ll keep on praying for you.
Big (((HUGS))) to you all. I hope you are all feeling better soon.
Hugs to you! You are doing nothing wrong!! When my four were little we had 5 (yes 5) hospitalizations in one month. It just happens. They got it all out of their system early on and have been healthy children and teens. I’m praying its the same for you!
Oh Lyndsay, I am in tears over here. You guys are really having such a tough time. You are in my thoughts and prayers and thank God that everyone is (sort of) okay.
oh my…so so scary..((((hugs)))) for everyone..especially mama. sending peace and prayers..
Oh Lyndsay! HUGS girl. You are not a bad mommy, things just happen. I’m so glad she is better and will say a special prayer for your family!!
When it rains it pours–ugh. I’m so sorry you had to go through all that, I can’t imagine. So glad you have good friends there to support you–hope things get better soon!
Oh Dear, Lyndsay…SO sorry to hear about this! Sending prayers for the entire family today.
Lyndsay & family – Oh my! My heart goes out to you! I totally feel your pain because my 3 yo daughter did the same thing at the park at the beginning of the summer but I waited 24 hrs to seek medical care for her – talk about feeling like a horrible mom! After the first day or so, she did so much better than I did for those 4 weeks, and now, she’s good as new! Hang in there! Hugs and smiles from OHIO! Hope you all got some rest this weekend! Heather in Ohio
I am so sorry for all that you and your family have been going through. Even though we don’t know each other, please know you are in my thoughts and I hope that your children are feeling well again real soon. Keep your head up – I know you are a great mom – and that is just from reading your blog!!
Oh man poor Taryn. How’s she doing today? I keep her in my thoughts and prayers. And don’t blame yourself, as much as moms like to say so they don’t have eyes in the back of their heads, you can’t watch them 24/7. Take it from someone whos a Nanny to 4, I can’t watch all of them at once. You’re a great mom 😉
HOLY CRAP. Man…..how terrible. I am hoping that she’s feeling better. YES, you are having a HECK of a week. Praying for you friend!
OMG! It hurt me to read it. I know all to well how you feel. Gaby had an accident in the bathtub 2 weeks ago and was rushed to the ER, transferred to children’s then went directly into surgery. It was the most awful night of my life. The worry, the blame, wishing you could take the pain away. I am so sorry you went through this. Kids bounce back amazingly, I think it much much harder on us then on them.