Tonight, for the last time, I put my baby to sleep in his crib. I know it seems silly, but this makes me so sad. It’s the end of an era for our family. No more cribs, our baby is getting bigger, and today he reached out and fell over the edge, hitting the floor hard. Thankfully, he is fine. I wasn’t in the room when it happened, but only steps away and ran to him when I heard the thud. We both cried. It scared all of us, and we had to make some quick decisions tonight that involve removing the crib and replacing it with a toddler bed. My heart isn’t ready for the crib to be gone forever. Maybe it’s because I’m so attached to this crib. We bought a new crib for Taryn before she was born, and before she ever slept a single night in it, Hurricane Katrina ate it, along with everything else in our home. When it came time to rebuild, the crib was so, so important to me. I fretted over it, but when it came time to replace it, I just couldn’t make myself do it for some reason. I was so unexpectedly emotional about it. Until one day my mom called me and said “get over it and order it already”…and I did. It turns out the original model we bought Taryn was being discontinued, but I found one, and only one, all the way in Baton Rouge. I bought it over the phone and made Jason drive all the way up there to get it, even though we had 8 million other things going on with rebuilding the house. I had to have that crib. It had to be the same. And that crib eventually turned into Teagan’s crib. The first time I put him in it, he was tiny, barely 7 lbs, fresh out of NICU and I stood there and watched him breathing for I don’t even know how long. It’s well loved with teeth marks in the side of it from both Taryn and Teagan. There have been so many moments I’ve looked over the edge and marveled at the miracle laying in it. So many moments that I never want to forget, here is just one. It’s where they slept, and grew and dreamed.
And God bless my husband, who puts up with me when I get anxious and nostalgic about the little things. And for giving me a big hug after I left Teagan’s room with tears in my eyes tonight. And for putting the new toddler bed together at 11:30 pm. And for being thoughtful enough to call it a “little boy bed” instead of a “big boy bed”, only for my sake. And for bringing me a piece of cheesecake. A good man, that one is.
You always remind me to document the little things, the daily things. It seems so soon, I’m curious to see how naps, and sleeping goes now that he can get out so easily. Its tough when they tell you they’re ready when you aren’t.
Your post brought me to tears Lyndsay! My baby is only a few months younger than your baby, and although we don’t know if we’re done or not (2 is oh-so-nice, but we’ve always wanted 3), I am much more nostalgic with this little guy than with his brother. Everything is new and exciting for big brother, but for baby brother…it’s “hold on, WAIT, don’t grow up” — so I understand where you are coming from. What a good hubby you got for understanding and being there! Good luck with the transition. I’ll be watching to see how it goes!
Your writing is as beautiful as your pictures…(this brought tears to my eyes). Yes, you have a wonderful husband and I bet he loves you even more for being so nostalgic about the little things.
Thanks for the tears first thing in the morning! I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there is something about Teagan that reminds me so much of my own baby boy. Maybe it’s the way you always put into words exactly how I feel about that sweet little boy of mine.
this post got me. im all teary sitting here, feeling for you and understanding. for me, my “baby” will move out of MY bed soon and into his crib all night long. its hard to make those final transitions and let their babyhood slip behind you. awesome husband you have – so sweet!
((Hugs)). Thank you for pointing out the things you do. I adore everything about your work and you make my photograph my own more often. Great man you’ve got there too.
What a sweet post. We’ll be close to moving our little one into a big bed soon, and it makes me nostaligic too. You brought tears to my eyes this morning…so sweet…
I know just how you feel! At each stage of our babies growing up I felt so sad….”we’re out of the bonnet stage”…”we’re done with the binky stage”…”we’re done with the diaper stage” (okay that was a good one!)…”we don’t have a baby anymore”….but we now have two gorgeous big girls and so many great memories! Our crib was broken when movers moved us into our new house-it can be repaired, but it was still hard for me. I’m planning on grandbabies sleeping in it someday in the far-off future-lol!
oh, the emotions! i bawled like a baby when we finally took down my crib that had been used for 8 years by all 3 kids. feeling your pain.
HUGS!!!! We had to do the same thing a while back, and for some reason this time around I cried. Harder than ever. We’re trying for another little one, but something this time around made it harder! 🙁 KUDOS to a great husband! You’ve got a special one!
Ohhh..we’ll be experiencing this all too soon as our youngest is our last one as well. She is a little older than Teagan (if I remember correctly), but hasn’t tried to escape yet..she seems pretty content in her own little world where big brother can’t get her without mommy noticing! Kudos to Jason for calling it a “little boy bed”…makes it last a little longer, doesn’t it?
oh how i love this post. i am going through the same thing. hugs to you.
Oh, you made me cry! My little guy is 17 months. I know that time is coming faster than I’m ready! I have two amazing step-kids, ages 8 & 6. Three is a good number for us, too. But that doesn’t help the lump in my throat at the thought of my baby growing up. 🙁
I was linked to your blog when you did the gorgeous first shot of Teagan in the tie. It’s fun watching our guys grow and change at similar paces. Then every once in a while there’s a post like this that reminds me that no matter how hard I’m trying not to miss a single moment, they’re flying right by. I’m afraid I’m going to blink again and have a teenager!
How’d he do his first night in his new rail-less crib?
Oh, Lyndsay! I can SO understand. I actually think it’s great that you got so attached to Teagan’s crib. I have a hard time being sentimental with much of anything since the storm and I was the ultimate “save everything packrat.” I still save things, but just can’t seem to allow myself to get THAT emotionally attached anymore.
Can’t wait to hear how he likes his litte boy bed!! 🙂
oh man. i know i’ll feel the same way… minus the hurricane I guess! 🙂 Great post… made me get all weepy! And thanks for the reminder to photograph them IN the bed more… I forget that!
Oh boy…almost got a bit teary reading that entry. I’m dealing with my own feelings of sadness and anxiety and nostalgia over the little things. My baby girl (my last baby…sniff…) is rapidly approaching her first birthday and I can’t believe how fast it’s gone by. So much faster than with my son. And I do get a lot of anxiety when I realize just how quickly time passes and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Oh why must they grow up so very fast?
hi, FYI, you do not need to jump into moving him to a toddler bed….my daughter fell out of hers at 19 months, and never did it again. She is 2.5 now and still happily in the crib….I say keep them in there the longer the better….But best of luck with the toddler bed. Keep us posted.
Well you sure know how to make a mommy cry! I don’t want to think about my little one moving out of the crib. This first year has flown by too fast, (faster than his sister’s 1st year!) and he may well be the baby of our family. I’ll be thinking about you tomorrow! I’m so glad you have all these memories of Taryn & Teagan’s crib…love all the pics!
::sniffle:: it’s always those seemingly little changes that seem so huge! and i totally get the crib thing. heck, my youngest son was still sleeping in his crib until a few months ago and he’s FOUR & A HALF! And I still cried seeing that bed in place of the crib and him climbing in it. Love that the crib and his time in it was so well documented!
from one sentimental girl to another, i am sniffling right along with you. they grow up too fast, sigh…
Aww… your post made me all misty-eyed! My little man is nearing the age of toddler bed, and I’m not sure how I’ll handle it when the time comes. I do know though, that my Mister will be as fantastic with me as yours was with you. Three cheers for FANTASTIC husbands!