Dear Teagan,

I can’t believe you are already 3.  I’m not sure where the time went, but I’m so thankful I got to spend it all with you.  You are special, there is no denying it.  You are our chill little man and daddy and I often joke that we earned you the hard way because Ty and Taryn are not chill or easy in any way, shape or form.  You are along for the ride, go with the flow and happy.  It’s just who you are and I love that about you.  And somehow, in the middle of all this chaos, and two strong willed and uber personality siblings, you have found your place in this family.  That is no small task.  You, are the funny one.  You are always making someone laugh, you love to see our faces react when you are funny and you watch for our eyes to light up when you are there.  You get genuine laughs out of us all, multiple times a day and if I ask your brother and sister what they love the most about you, it is an easy answer of how funny you are.  Your jokes, your antics, the little light in your eyes when you know you get something right, your timing….you are funny.  And you are sweet, you snuggle and love and cuddle and I am so thankful for that.  You love your blankie and your bink.  You chug your water like no one’s business.  You are cautious and shy around new people.  You love your mohawk and when mommy puts you to sleep at night.  You say your favorite food is mac-e-cheese, but you never eat it.  You really love raspberries.  You love to swing on the swings and ride your plasma car.  You’ve taken every new treatment, every new supplement, every new therapy in stride without so much as a complaint.  Your year was filled with loosing skills and relearning them, you worked so hard and I’m so very proud of you for that.  You love going to playgroup and you are starting to make new friends.  I hope your 3rd year will bring you to pre-k and I can’t wait to watch you flourish in school.  You always worry about Ty and Taryn when they are not home and ask me who will pick them up.  Your love Mickey Mouse and at the end of the show, every single time, you ask me “why dat mouse singin’ about hot dogs momma?”  You are Taryn’s trusty sidekick and partner in crime.  You are Ty’s little buddy and think he hung the moon.  You can’t figure out why people would want mommy to take their picture, and when I come home from work and you sit on my lap while I edit you ask why I took their picture instead of yours.  You love the flip camera and recording our family, your videos always make me laugh (and cringe some too).  Today at nap time you brought me a book to read to you, just as you always do.  Today you chose “I knew you could” and when you handed it to me, I started to cry.  I barely made it through this book because it speaks to where you are, where you have been and the way you will face your life ahead of you.  The first page says “I knew you could.  And you knew it too.  That you’d come out on top after all you’ve been through.  And from here you’ll go farther, and see brand new sights, you’ll face brand new hills and rise to new heights.”  I believe that will all my heart.  I believe in you.  And thanks to you, I believe in myself.  You’ve taught me more about love and fear and loyalty and pain and trust and strength in the last year than I’d ever have imagined.  There was a time not so long ago that we dreaded the proximity of your 3rd birthday.  The fear of the blood / brain barrier closing off, usually around the 3rd birthday loomed and reminded us that we had a limited amount of time to get you as well as we could, as fast as we could.  I used to keep a calendar in your medical files to remind me of why we were working so hard, sleeping so little, researching so much, we could not give up.  You are here, well in mind and body after a long year and a long road.  I can honestly say that today is just like all our other days with you, we celebrate our moments and time with you daily.  But today you get a cupcake and presents too, which you are thrilled about.  God is going to do amazing things with you Teagan.  I see it so clearly.  And I’m so thankful to be your mommy.

I love you duder.

Mommy